Inconsiderate People
Jun. 4th, 2005 09:32 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rhienellethWhat the fuck ever. Seriously.
Say we're friends, good friends. And we've had plans for a week to get together tonight. Because next weekend we're all busy, as we all will be for most of the summer. But you and a mutual friend who we also had plans with tonight have to participate in a parade today for your job(s), for which purpose you stayed up really late the night before doing decorations. You go to the parade, do your thing, and get home about 2pm in the afternoon, not feeling particularly well. Bit of a headache, no food, too much sun. You take a nap, still don't feel well. About six o'clock, I call you and leave a message, tell you I'll be there about 7pm, as that is our usual time to get together.
And I would have been there. Really. Except that Mark got home right as I was walking out the door, literally, and he was sore from pounding nails all day, so I took fifteen minutes and gave him a back rub.
You call me at precisely 7:16, about the time I should have been pulling up to your house, to let me know you don't feel good (first I've heard of it) and don't feel up to having a bunch of people over, and yadda yadda. Except it isn't you calling, it's the mutual friend...calling from your phone, because she took a nap at your house after the parade, and is apparently still there. (Oh, and I'm sure not feeling good, either, as she is still there even now, I'm sure. Since I've already tried calling her at home to see if she wanted to do something, as she had said nothing about feeling sick. She wasn't there.)
So, apparently you feel good enough to hang out together in your mutual misery, just not good enough to include me. As if I'm some syphon of energy? It isn't as though I expected you to keep our plans to roleplay. By all means, if you don't feel up to it, we could watch movies, instead.
You know, I probably wouldn't be so bitter if you'd told me by, say, four or five o'clock that you weren't feeling well, when I could have made plans to do something else. Now I'm at home on a Saturday night with nothing whatsoever to do, and a husband who is too tired to do anything with. And I'm thinking bitter, selfish thoughts like "Thanks so much for cancelling last minute," and "I guess you feel good enough to let V continue staying at your house, instead of sending her home," and "You know, it wouldn't bother me so much if this was the first and/or only time this had happened."
I'm just going to slink off for more self-pitying and cynicism, k?
P.S. Just FYI, I had the new P&P trailer all downloaded and loaded up to my laptop to show you. As we have our yearly Pride and Prejudice moviefest, I was understandably excited about this. I'm sure not being able to squee with you about it is adding to my disappointment and general bitchy-ness.
Say we're friends, good friends. And we've had plans for a week to get together tonight. Because next weekend we're all busy, as we all will be for most of the summer. But you and a mutual friend who we also had plans with tonight have to participate in a parade today for your job(s), for which purpose you stayed up really late the night before doing decorations. You go to the parade, do your thing, and get home about 2pm in the afternoon, not feeling particularly well. Bit of a headache, no food, too much sun. You take a nap, still don't feel well. About six o'clock, I call you and leave a message, tell you I'll be there about 7pm, as that is our usual time to get together.
And I would have been there. Really. Except that Mark got home right as I was walking out the door, literally, and he was sore from pounding nails all day, so I took fifteen minutes and gave him a back rub.
You call me at precisely 7:16, about the time I should have been pulling up to your house, to let me know you don't feel good (first I've heard of it) and don't feel up to having a bunch of people over, and yadda yadda. Except it isn't you calling, it's the mutual friend...calling from your phone, because she took a nap at your house after the parade, and is apparently still there. (Oh, and I'm sure not feeling good, either, as she is still there even now, I'm sure. Since I've already tried calling her at home to see if she wanted to do something, as she had said nothing about feeling sick. She wasn't there.)
So, apparently you feel good enough to hang out together in your mutual misery, just not good enough to include me. As if I'm some syphon of energy? It isn't as though I expected you to keep our plans to roleplay. By all means, if you don't feel up to it, we could watch movies, instead.
You know, I probably wouldn't be so bitter if you'd told me by, say, four or five o'clock that you weren't feeling well, when I could have made plans to do something else. Now I'm at home on a Saturday night with nothing whatsoever to do, and a husband who is too tired to do anything with. And I'm thinking bitter, selfish thoughts like "Thanks so much for cancelling last minute," and "I guess you feel good enough to let V continue staying at your house, instead of sending her home," and "You know, it wouldn't bother me so much if this was the first and/or only time this had happened."
I'm just going to slink off for more self-pitying and cynicism, k?
P.S. Just FYI, I had the new P&P trailer all downloaded and loaded up to my laptop to show you. As we have our yearly Pride and Prejudice moviefest, I was understandably excited about this. I'm sure not being able to squee with you about it is adding to my disappointment and general bitchy-ness.
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no subject
Date: 2005-06-05 05:34 am (UTC)I know! What's up with the you're-too-sick-to-hang-with-me-but-you-can-hang-with-the-other-person-just-fine thing? I feel your bitterness and your anger. It makes you strong, young Rhienelleth. Use your hate to strike them down!! Er...got possessed by the Emperor evidently. ;)
Seriously though, the same thing has happened to me and I don't know what to say. My friends aren't bad people--wouldn't be friends with them otherwise, but it kind of upsets me when they don't think of the repercussions of their actions and decisions. It's like they're a little too self-absorbed to see beyond their needs, like they can't think beyond themselves.
I've done things when I really wasn't in the mood but because I made plans with another person and I respect them and their time too much I didn't back out. I mean, if I had a raging fever of 102 and was throwing up, yeah, I'd cancel. I don't think they'd want to be around me. But a little tired or out of sorts? Aren't friends actually supposed to make you feel better and help during those times? And a quiet movie night sounds like it would have hit the spot.
no subject
Date: 2005-06-05 05:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-05 11:51 am (UTC)And ooh, roleplaying? Fantasy RPG? *perks up*